The Larry Kane Report

To: Conan O’Brien

Re: Advice on switching stations

First and foremost, I am not a comedian, nor do I have a head of hair or personality like yours. But I do have a history of switching stations, having worked in three of the network-owned TV stations in Philadelphia over 37 years. It is not easy to switch stations. In fact, it is very difficult, because it all comes down to the right “fit.” I did well, but never as well as my first station. So you have to throw away the ago and do your best,  If you let ego determine your next move, you may very  well make a mistake. Of course, you have the money, but money can’t buy you love, although Tiger Woods may disagree. You could go up against Leno  and Letterman, but that probably won’t work. So, what should you do? America needs a sense of humor Conan!  I would move to Nevada or New York and place yourself in nomination for the U.S. Senate. Al Franken needs some company . The Senate can be a humorless place. If that doesn’t work, there may be an opening at Homeland Security in a few months. Frankly, it’s time to stay in place, or take the money and run – for political office. Isn’t it time to put country first?

Speaking of the Senate: Arlen Specter is on our Comcast Voice of Reason show Sunday at 9:30 on the Comcast Network. His primary challenger, Joe Sestak will join us next month. Now that the plug is over, let’s talk politics and football and TV.

Harry Reid’s infamous remarks from the 2008 campaign on race and Barack Obama prove once and for all that racial stereotypes are not limited to any one party or cause. Should the Senate Majority Leader step down?  That’s his call, but it’s petty for the GOP to use the flap to call for Reid to quit, and its absurd for the Democratic party to defend the Nevada politician who obviously is a different man than we thought he was. There are really few limits to narrow mindedness in our free society. But life goes on in the Capitol when a health care bill is at stake. Morality takes a vacation when political gain is on the line.

GET OVER IT

Another Reid in the news.

Andy Reid is no Harry Reid, but in the eyes of Eagle’s nation, the good-hearted coach is to blame for all the ills of the universe. I get heat for this every year, but in the end, I like to remind people that it is a game. We lost it very convincingly, but it’s not worth another day of agony. Life goes on, and right now, the Flyers are looking good, and the Phillies are just around the corner. There are some highlights of the season – the winning streak; Merrill Reese’s play by play, the young players, and there are also low lights – the spitting episode in Dallas and the failure to sign Jon Runyan. Runyon now runs for Congress, but what an irony – the former Eagle may wind up in the Super Bowl first. IF RUNYAN CAN RUN, CAN CONAN BE FAR BEHIND?

SARAH TV

Sarah Palin has signed with Fox. What a surprise. She will do very well there but her views are predictable. Fox may want to put her in the 11:30 time slot. It would be very convenient. She could do the show at 6:30 PM Alaska time, and her monologues might be dynamite. She could also simulcast to Russia.

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Happy New Year, and I mean that. I mean that even to some of the knuckleheads who write here in reaction to, and I mean this, mostly to themselves. I never imagined that this space would serve as an emotional depository to some really unusual people. But rock on!

On to the news: President Obama’s  reaction to the renewed terrorist threat was nullified by Homeland Security chief Janet Napolitano’s reaction that the system worked. The system failed, pure and simple. Former Governor Tom Kean, co-chair of the 9/11 Commission, was amazed that we have not learned the lessons of what horrible teamwork by government agencies can bring. This is priority number one for America right now. The last line of defense has been the brave passengers on airliners; the first line should be our government. It doesn’t matter who is in power. The government has to work!

Political note: Watch what outgoing Philadelphia DA Lynne Abraham does. She is being courted by both the Joe Sestak and Arlen Specter campaigns for an endorsement in the very hot Democratic Senate primary. An endorsement of Sestak would be a big blow to the Specter campaign. But don’t bet on that. Or don’t bet on my forecasting skills.  Highly suspect, wouldn’t you say?

One thing is certain. This will be the hottest political year since 2008. Along with the Specter-Sestak dustup, there are, at least count, five Democrats seeking the nomination for Governor, including Tom Knox. In a splintered field, the well-financed Knox may do well, especially since the suspected frontrunner, Allegheny County Executive Dan  hasn’t yet made a strong mark in the campaign. Onorato is formidable because he’s raised a lot of money, but so is Auditor General Jack Wagner and Joe Hoeffel, who is hoping to sweep the east.

EAGLES EXCITEMENT — This is the golden era of Philadelphia sports. Enjoy it while you. It has been a great season for the Eagles, but I’m still bummed out about the player’s selection of Michael Vick for the team “courage” award. That, is plain and simple, a blow for common sense. I am one of those who defended Michael Vick’s second chance, but an award for courage? What courage? The courage to show up and make a couple of million dollars to play ball, in the shadow of prison and disgrace. Actually the coach should get the courage award for having the guts to give an unpopular felon a second chance. But Vick? No way.

A question for Chuck Ramsey, Philadelphia’s Police Commissioner. Is there any traffic enforcement on I-95? The highway is a free-for-all and recent tragic accidents are part of a long line of auto disasters on one of the most dangerous highways in the nation. Ramsey seems to be doing a great job, but reckless speed can kill as fast as a bullet. We need enforcement on I-95.

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