Straight Advice To Conan O’Brien – And Eagles Fans: Get Over It
To: Conan O’Brien
Re: Advice on switching stations
First and foremost, I am not a comedian, nor do I have a head of hair or personality like yours. But I do have a history of switching stations, having worked in three of the network-owned TV stations in Philadelphia over 37 years. It is not easy to switch stations. In fact, it is very difficult, because it all comes down to the right “fit.” I did well, but never as well as my first station. So you have to throw away the ago and do your best, If you let ego determine your next move, you may very well make a mistake. Of course, you have the money, but money can’t buy you love, although Tiger Woods may disagree. You could go up against Leno and Letterman, but that probably won’t work. So, what should you do? America needs a sense of humor Conan! I would move to Nevada or New York and place yourself in nomination for the U.S. Senate. Al Franken needs some company . The Senate can be a humorless place. If that doesn’t work, there may be an opening at Homeland Security in a few months. Frankly, it’s time to stay in place, or take the money and run – for political office. Isn’t it time to put country first?
Speaking of the Senate: Arlen Specter is on our Comcast Voice of Reason show Sunday at 9:30 on the Comcast Network. His primary challenger, Joe Sestak will join us next month. Now that the plug is over, let’s talk politics and football and TV.
Harry Reid’s infamous remarks from the 2008 campaign on race and Barack Obama prove once and for all that racial stereotypes are not limited to any one party or cause. Should the Senate Majority Leader step down? That’s his call, but it’s petty for the GOP to use the flap to call for Reid to quit, and its absurd for the Democratic party to defend the Nevada politician who obviously is a different man than we thought he was. There are really few limits to narrow mindedness in our free society. But life goes on in the Capitol when a health care bill is at stake. Morality takes a vacation when political gain is on the line.
GET OVER IT
Another Reid in the news.
Andy Reid is no Harry Reid, but in the eyes of Eagle’s nation, the good-hearted coach is to blame for all the ills of the universe. I get heat for this every year, but in the end, I like to remind people that it is a game. We lost it very convincingly, but it’s not worth another day of agony. Life goes on, and right now, the Flyers are looking good, and the Phillies are just around the corner. There are some highlights of the season – the winning streak; Merrill Reese’s play by play, the young players, and there are also low lights – the spitting episode in Dallas and the failure to sign Jon Runyan. Runyon now runs for Congress, but what an irony – the former Eagle may wind up in the Super Bowl first. IF RUNYAN CAN RUN, CAN CONAN BE FAR BEHIND?
SARAH TV
Sarah Palin has signed with Fox. What a surprise. She will do very well there but her views are predictable. Fox may want to put her in the 11:30 time slot. It would be very convenient. She could do the show at 6:30 PM Alaska time, and her monologues might be dynamite. She could also simulcast to Russia.
Comments(35)
“She could also simulcast to Russia.” Cutting edge humor right there,Larry.I didn’t think you’d go too long into 2010 without dragging in Palin.
Couple problems with your article. 1. No one cares about Dave Spadaro. 2. Merrill will always be Merrill. 3. The winning streak means nothing if you cant perform in the playoffs. 4. You’re right it is not worth another day of agony, but when your team president calls your team the “gold standard” and no hardware to show for your efforts, well I don’t think you can just call just a game. Fail for the article.
For a seasoned journalist, this posting is absolutely riddled with typographical errors and mispelled names (Jon RUNYAN, anyone?) Is the economy so strapped that LarryKane.com can’t afford a copy editor? This website is a joke.
Yea, Conan should let go of his “ago” because it could cause some mistakes. I even thought for a split second that it was some sort of ironic, intentional error, but nah.
Larry haste makes waste. Don’t let your ago get in the way.
Larry taking another shot at Sarah Palin. Who would have guessed?
I switched stations once but it was confusing when I wasn’t watching Focks News and hearing the staedy drumbeating of Denali, the great one and the pitbull lipstick teabaggers ya know. I put all my secret Focks memos on Yahoo mail ya know. Tina Fay said she will come on to innerview about having a baby on TV.
I once thought that Harry Reid was one of the most dangerous people in Washington. I fear that Chuck Schumer may actually turn out to be a greater adversary.
Larry, don’t worry, no one will confuse you for a comedian. No one will confuse Conan O’Brien for a comedian either.
Senate is a humorless place? It’s a laugh a minute with cartoon characters like Kennedy, Kerry and Franken gracing the hallowed halls.
Larry, not for nothing, but there is no requirement for you to grab the subject matter from the last 2 blogs and turn it into your next blog topic. There really should be no rush to post your next “News Flash” after you disappear for 7-10 days at a time.
Did you find yourself with freetime between Arts and Crafts and your 4PM dinner seating today? To what do we owe the honor of your presence?
KT, check past posts. Larry is a serial bumbler.
Fish, Fish, Fish, give Larry a break. He finally understands that we aren’t going away. His excursion into satirical writing is a breath of fresh air from the god awful things he has posted in the past. It shows that at least he is trying instead of merely throwing out inane topics. I still can’t get over the Chuck Ramsey I 95 complaint. Hang in there Larry but stay away from sports topics, you don’t know how to spell the athletes’ names.
As for you “can’t buy love”, ask Eliot Spitzer. He bought a whole lotta love (and it wasn’t cheap).
Conan O’brien doest need any advice from a washed
up newscaster who was bumped off all three local
TV affiliates. Conan will be back and bigger than
ever. Leno has been exposed as not funny in primetime
or anytime, he’s finished. Letterman is a bitter old
liberal who is funny at times and at least has
some gonads like Conan. Leno’s nuts are in Jeff
Zuckers mouth, and its not very funny, but is going
to cost NBC 10s of millions.
I’ve had that post up since 5 O’clock and nobody has responded yet. Why, oh why do I even come here anymore? Maybe it’s Lord Abott’s fault or maybe there is no Lord Abott. It’s all been just a figment of my imagination. Could be that the Larry Kane Report isn’t really a report but just some musing material pontificated by a has been TV anchor who has nothing better to do with his time?
Poor Ed nobody responded to him! Shivering
by the heat pump and angry at the world,
especially good looking men with lots of
money. I’d like to retrofit Ed with a gas
fired Buderus hot water boiler, them he’d
have some hot pipes to keep himself warm.
Hatti might be the worst catastrophe in the
Western Hemisphere in the couple centuries.
God must really be made at the Hatians, why else
would he do this to such a poor country. They
are lucky we have black president, Obama will
treat them better than Katrina Victims, and
its actually not that costly compared to the
bank bailout. Hopefully he will boat lift these
Poor Hatians to Florida and give them foreclosed
houses, that’s the best way to show them Ameicans
care and to make up for Katrina.
The looting, raping and murdering is going to
be off the hook in Haiti, I hope Obama has
enough extra American troops to quell it, its
so scary and sad. But larry is talking about
Conan Obrien and Sarah Palin today, what an
insightful newstool!
Haiti is not your concern, mate. Haiti is Haiti’s problem. Why do you Yanks feel compelled to help people all the time is beyond me. You’ll spend millions sending recovery supplies to Haiti. You throw billions of dollars into foreign aid. Unless there is a product or raw material coming from Haiti that you can’t get somewhere else, what’s your blooming interest? Do you think these third world nations appreciate any of this? Blimey.
The president of Haiti just thanked Americans
for their help and generosity. Katrina was a
joke compared to the Hatian catastrophe, yet
the learned helplessness of many black American
caused them to stand and whine in a parking lot
for three days and bitch about the amount of
free housing, food and clothing the goverment
gave them. We should send Katrina victims to
Haiti to help and maybe they’d better appreciate
how good they had it, they shoould be ashamed
of their behavior.
The Haitian tragedy is almost
Bibilcal, and the people of the world really
need to come together to relieve this tragedy.
It pales in comparrison to anything ever experienced
in the U.S. Including 9-11 and Katrina combined.
Waiting for the 7:01. Back to DC and back to work. Got to make the donuts.
This Haitian earthquake thingy was pretty bad huh? I’m surprised Barack did not designate me as point man. Not that I really want to go down there. No power. No running water. People living in cardboard shacks. General mayhem and public unrest. Looting, raping and murders. Sounds like North Philly. You don’t see me up there. Let some young aides do the ground work there. I’m more of an Aruba guy. It is much more civilized and set up for Northeast vacationers. A bit windy for my liking but at least the breeze offsets the Equator heat. It is about time to plan my April vacation.
How about that fraud Bill Clinton flying to Haiti. First on the scene looking very much like the humanitarian. Reality is he is desperate to get on the news. Be seen. Be relevant. Appear to be a real humanitarian when it is all shameless self promotion. Shameless in general for that matter. Did Barack send him or did he just charter a plane? That part is not clear to me. Maybe Barack is secretly hoping something bad will happen to him while he’s down there. You know pummeled by local man after he tries to tap his wife. You know that is a distinct possibility. Little Willie gets him into so many tight spots.
Gecko there is one product that we get from Haiti that we would have a hard time replacing in the short term. Baseballs. MLB baseballs are made exclusively in Haiti. With only 5 weeks to Spring Training opening and another 9 weeks to the regular season this could create a disasterous situation here if there are insufficient balls. This would require a Congressional investigation. How could the powers at be at MLB allow the entire baseball season to ride on a backwater nation like Haiti? This could be bigger than PEDs.
Biden/Biden in 2012! We got balls!
Sent Via Blackberry by Verizon
Lord ASbott is right about Katrinia and the bibblical wrath in Haitee. Jesus himself telled me that he would get even with the Hateeans for their devil pact to get white people out. Pat Robertson says so and I know that got to be right.
OK, I’m a little embarrassed by my post last night. What I was looking for was conformation that Larry was actually trying to be funny. I know you guys think Larry should have reported on the destruction in Haiti but hey you’ll be hearing about that tragedy for years to come, whereas Larry trying to be funny is once in a lifetime. Sort of like if Lord Abbot wrote something without his snobbish nose pointing to the ceiling….
It can’t be easy being a snob when in fact you have nothing to be proud of except your gas boiler heater.
Ed, I understand you are trying to reward Larry for perceived good behavior. Is it really good behavior or Larry’s attempt to be Conan O’Brien?
Buderus Ed, its a great boiler, energy efficient
$1500 tax credit too. I know you missed the
Clunker Cash, so why don’t you man up and
spend some money to keep your family warm.
There’s nothing snobish about a man providing
for his family, its what men are supposed to do.
Ed, look away from the light that is Lord Abott. You can only gaze at the Lord you can not stare without being blinded by the light. It’s like ataring at cleavage. Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don’t stare at it. It’s too risky. Ya get a sense of it and then you look away.
I’m running for Governor of Caifornia on a platform of cleavage and tatoos.
Pam that is a great platform. I did that without the tats. More of a tits for tats thing. It is amazing how many dumbasses you can get to vote for you. I got all the guys in Alaska. And I’m actually pretty homely without the 3 lbs. of make up.
Larry you are not funny. You have bad hair. You are not charsimatic. You got nothing. Except a half dozen wannabe sickkicks. Do you smell like an old man? Stop trying to impersonate me tool.
Conan, you’ve got me wrong. I’m not a Larry Kane sidekick as much as a wake up call for those like Larry Kane. If Larry had a half a brain he would see that he has a pulpit to expound on his political beliefs. More so than you or me. If Larry weren’t such a dufus he would understand that there are those of us out here who need a voice. We need somewhere to go in order to vent our views. So far there are six or seven of us who do so. Being a patient bunch we are willing to wait for the rest to join us.
My god Larry thinks Merril Reese is a highlight of the Eagles season. I don’t have much hope for my mission..
You betch Sar. You stick to your guns girl. You may be flashing 6 shooters but I’m hauling bazookas.
Hello mates. This says it all.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gc9fsPTyqe8&feature=player_embedded#
Waiting for the 7:01. TGIF. This has been a particularly difficult week for me. All the stress from the funeral and the preparations really took it out of me. It went well. RIP Mom. You were one of the very good ones.
I return to this site expecting to read about healthcare backdeals or the catastrophic earthquake or Harry Reid’s unfortuate comments about Barack or even a eulogy for my Mom. You know something of substance. Instead we get career advice for Conan O’Brien from network mogul Larry and his defense of Andy Reid. You have got to be shitting me. Larry how can the once great teleprompter reader from Action News have morphed into this sniveling idiotic robot that consciously looks the other way when liberals lose their way, always lands on the side of political correctness and takes every available shot at Sarah Palin? What happened to you man? This is an embarrassment of biblical proportions. How can you continue to throw out this drivel as a purported News Flash?
I look forward to a quiet weekend at home. Breakfast at Maggies then demo at Home Depot and dinner at Tyler Fitzgerald’s. Maybe I’ll watch my DVD The Hangover again while I wait for SNL. Sunday I’ll sleep in then have a big breakfast and follow that up with a monster dump.
I have to finish reading the healthcare bill. I’m up to page 165. I have a long way to go. It will likely change several times behind closed doors before I finish. No one will have read the final draft when it is voted on. Not even the aides. What a country!
Biden/Biden in 2012! We’ll stay up all night reading your legislature.
Sent Via Blackberry by Verizon
Potter is tired of Conan/Leno war, and I would like to have the last word on this, its stupid. Conan walked away with $40 million, he’s funny but not that funny, its absurd- last word!